My Dick is So Big That…
There’s still snow on it in the summertime!
I went to the Viper room and it got in while I had to argue with the doorman!
I have to call it Mr. Dick in front of company!
It won’t return Speilberg’s calls!
It graduated a year ahead of me in high school!
It has an elevator and a lobby!
It has better credit than I do!
Clowns climb out of it when I come!
It was once overthrown by a military coup!
It’s known as the Democratic Republic of My Dick!
It has casters!
It’s already screwing a girl tomorrow!
Ships use it to find their way!
They named a movie after it: Godzilla vs. My Dick!
It lives next door!
That I entered it in a big dick contest and it came in first, second and third!
It votes!
It’s a better dresser than I am!
It has a three-picture deal!
It’s head has only seen my balls in photos!
Mark McGuire used it to hit home runs!
It runs the 440 in fifteen seconds!
It’s the walrus kookooka joob!
No matter where I go, it always gets there first!
It takes longer lunches than I do!
It contributed $100,000 to the National Democratic Committee!
It was once ambassador to China!
It’s gone condo!
It hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee!
It was almost drafted by the Cleveland Browns, but Art Modell didn’t want a bigger dick on the team than himself!
I use the Eiffel Tower as a French tickler!
When it rains, the head of it doesn’t get wet!
I could wear it as a tie if I wasn’t so afraid of getting stiff and killing myself!
I have to use an elastic Zipper!
It has feet!
A homeless family lives underneath it!
It takes four fat women and a team of Clydesdales to jack me off!
My mother was in labor for three extra days!
They use the bullet train to test my condoms!
It has investors!
It seats six!
I use a hula-hoop as a cock ring!
We use it at parties as a limbo pole!
King Kong is going to crawl up it in the next remake!
It has an opening act!
I can fuck an elevator shaft!
It has its own Wheaties box!
I have to cook it breakfast in the mornings!
The city had to carve a hole in the middle of it so cars could get through!
Everytime I get hard I cause a solar eclipse!
It only plays arenas!
It needs an airplane warning light!
It was once set on fire for a Dino Di Laurentis movie!
If you cut it in half you can tell how old I am!
Trump wants to buy it!
We are all a part of it and it’s all a part of us!
I can never sit in the front row!
It has its own dick and even its dick is bigger than your dick!
you can’t blow me without a ladder!
It only does one show a night!
You can ski down it!
It has an elbow!
I have to check it as luggage when I fly!
It has a personal trainer!
That right now it’s in the other room fixing us drinks!
It has a retractable dome!
It has stairs up the center like the Statue of Liberty!
There’s a sneaker named “Air My Dick”!
I’m its bitch!
You must wear protective headgear to screw me!
It can climax a tuba!
Stephen Hawking has a theory about it!
It has its own gravity!
NASA once launched a space probe to search for its tip!
It’s impossible to see all of it except from space!
Inside it are billions and billions of stars!
It has a spine!
It has a basement!
Movie theaters now serve popcorn in small, medium, large and My Dick!
It has cable!
It violates 17 zoning laws!
It has a 50-yard line!
It has its own page on the Sierra Club calendar!
That I once got a blowjob in Tennessee when I was in Ohio!!
Las Vegas casinos fly it into town for free!
I can braid it!
That when the tip is in Eastern Standard Time, my balls are in Central!
I painted the foreskin red, white and blue and used it as a flag!
I can sit on it!
It can chew gum!
It only tips with hundreds!
Carnegie Deli named a sandwich after it!
The city was going to build a statue of it, but they ran out of cement!
When I get hard, my eyebrows get pulled down to my neck!
You’re standing on it!
It only comes into work when it fells like it!
It plays golf with the President!
It charges money for an autograph!
It has its own agent. “My dick’s people will call your people.” “Let’s have lunch with my dick!”
It’s right behind you!
Hugi notar vefkökur til að bæta notendaupplifun á vefsíðunni og greina umferð um hana.
Einnig hefur Hugi uppfært persónuverndarstefnu sína.