A Blonde's Year in Review

January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels…HELLOOO!…bottles won't fit in printer.

March - Got really excited…finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months….box said “2 - 4 years”

April - Trapped on escalator for hours…power went out.

May- Tried to make Kool-Aid - wrong instructions… 8 cups of water won't fit into that little packet.

June- Tried to go water skiing - couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - Lost breast stoke swimming competition…learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms.

August- Got locked out of my car in a rain storm…car swamped because soft-top was open.

September- The capital of California is “C”, isn't it?

October- Hate M&M's - they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days…instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108 !!!

December - Couldn't dial 911- duh - there's no eleven on the stupid phone.