*It's enjoyable hard or soft.

*It makes a mess too, but it tastes better.

*You always want to swallow.

*It won't complain if you share it with friends.

*It's “quick and convenient.”

*You can enjoy it more than once.

*It comes already protectively wrapped.

*You can make it as large as you want.

*If you don't finish it you can save it for later.

*It's easier to get the kind you want.

*You can comparison shop.

*It's easier to find in a grocery store.

*You can put it away when you've had enough.

*You know yours has never been eaten before.

*It won't complain if you chew on it.

*You can return it–satisfaction is guaranteed.

*It's always ready to go.

*You won't get arrested if you eat it in public.

*You don't have to change the sheets if you eat it in bed.

*It won't wake you up because it's hard.

*You don't have to find an excuse not to eat it.

*You can tell your friends how much you've eaten without sounding like you're bragging.

*It won't take up room in your bed.

*It's easy to pick up.

*It won't get jealous if you pick up another one.

*It never has an insecurity problem with its size.


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I do what I do, I am who I am, if you don´t like it……PISS OFF
-psycho 2001</b>

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