A ventriloquist walked into a little town in NZ and saw a farmer sitting on his porch with his dog.

Ventriloquist: Hey, cool dog. Mind if I speak to him?

Kiwi farmer: Dawgs can't talk.

Ventriloquist: Hey dog, how's it going?

Dog: Doin alright.

Kiwi farmer: (Extreme look of shock)

Ventriloquist: Is this your owner? (Pointing at Kiwi farmer)

Dog: Yep.

Ventriloquist: How's he treat you?

Dog: Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play.

Kiwi farmer: (Look of disbelief)

Ventriloquist: Mind if I talk to your horse ?

Kiwi farmer: Horses cain't talk.

Ventriloquist: Hey horse, how's it goin ?

Horse: Cool

Kiwi farmer: (An even wilder look of shock)

Ventriloquist: Is this your owner? (Pointing at the Kiwi farmer)

Horse: Yep.

Ventriloquist: How's he treat you?

Horse: Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements.

Kiwi farmer: [Total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: Mind if I talk to your sheep?

Kiwi farmer: (Gesturing wildly and hardly able to talk) Them sheep ain't nothing but liars!!!