Three Americans were up against a very large Russian in an important wrestling event. The Russian had a patented move called ‘'The Russian Pretzel,’' which, in most cases, would send his opponent to the hospital.
The Americans showed up to the match and the first American kid caught glimpse of the Russian and said to his coach, ‘'that’s a BIG Russian, coach. I'm gettin kinda worried!''
The coach replied, ‘'Don’t worry, kiddo, you know what to do. We've been workin on this for a long time now. Just go in there and tear him up!''
The young American wrestler started the match quite confidently, but after about a minute, the Russian picked him up and slammed him into the pretzel sending him off on a stretcher to the hospital.
The second American wrestler said to his coach, ‘'That didn’t look very good at all, coach. I don't know if I'm up for this.''
The coach replied, ‘'Don’t let him scare you, son. That's what he wants. You're my best shot. Go in there and show him what America's got!''
The American started the match out terribly and was slammed into the pretzel right away and they dragged him off on a stretcher to the hospital.
The third kid looks at the coach and says, ‘'I don’t think so, man. There's just NO WAY!''
The coach says, ‘'C’mon, son! You're my last chance! You gotta take him out!''
The kid starts the match pretty well, but the Russian grabs hold of him and starts to put him into that pretzel. The coach covers his eyes and turns his head in disgust. When the coach looks back, he sees the referee holding the American's hand up in victory. After meeting back up with the kid, the coach says, ‘'What the hell happened, son? I turned my head and when I looked back, you’d won?!'' The American says, ‘'Coach…that damn Russian picked me up and started twistin my body! It hurt BAD! I saw these two red things danglin’ there. I bit'em so hard… Coach… you'd be suprised what you can do when you bite your own balls!''