Two married buddies are out drinking one night when
one turns to the other and says, “You know, I don't
know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've
been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before
I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast
into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go
into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I get
undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my
wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out
so late!”

His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're
obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech
into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the
steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into
bed, rub my hands on my wife's butt and say,
'Lets do it!' ….and she's always sound asleep