I'd stop eating chocolate,but I'm no quitter!

I'm in shape….round is a shape.

I am built for comfort,not speed.

One of life´s mysteries is how a 2 pound box of candy can make a woman gain 5 lbs.

The older you get,the tougher it is to lose weight because by then,your body and your fat are really good friends.

Amazing!You hang something in your closet for awhile and it shrinks two sizes!

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

I don´t have an eating problem. I eat…I get fat. I buy new clothes.No problem!

If we are what we eat,then I´m fast,easy and cheap!

Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

Beer does not make you fat. It makes you lean….against bars,poles and tables.

How can I get on a diet? The fridge is still full!

62,15% of all statistics are meaningless.

You can´t have everything….where would you put it?

If you are open minded,your brain will fall out.

Nobody´s perfect and since I´m nobody……

I just ate my will power!

Remember the tea kettle~it is always up to its neck in hot water,yet it still sings.

Forget love….I´d rather fall in chocolate!!

Life is a box of chocolates…why do I get the cherry filled??

The future is uncertain…eat the dessert first.

Everything tastes good when you´re on diet.

A skinny cook can´t be trusted!

If god wanted my to cook,why did he invent restaurants????

She who cooks,never cleans!

I may be fat but you´re ugly,and I can diet!

The perfect food would taste as good as fresh popcorn smells!!

The way to a man´s heart is through his stomach.

Dieting is the penalty for exceeding the feed limit.

Dieting is wishful shrinking….!!

Eat,drink and be marry,for tomorrw we may diet.

Eat right.Stay fit.Die anyway.

God must have loved calories…he made so many of them!!!

A woman is like teabag…you never know how strong she is until you dip her into hot water.