* Mom calls to ask how you've been, and you immediately scream, “Get off my back, bitch!”
* When your parents inquire about your grades, you sing the Cookie Monster song: “C is for cookie, that's good enough for me…”
* You wake up to discover your bed is on fire, but go back to sleep because you just don't care.
* You've got so much on your mind, you've forgotten how to pee.
* Just to take a break from studying, you actually exit your dormitory when the nightly fire alarm goes off.
* You sleep more in class than at home.
* You leave for a party and instinctively bring your bookbag.
* Visions of the upcoming weekend help you make it through Monday.
* You think about how relaxing it would be if you were in jail right now!
* Your favorite phrase is “I don't give a s@#$.”
* The McDonald's people know you by name and know your order from your late night study breaks.
* You have spent more time figuring out that you only need a 54% on the final to pass than the time you have actually spent studying.
* When you start showering after class rather than before.
* The test papers are no longer worthy of the fridge door.
* When the campus drunk tells you that you should study more.
* When your favorite paperweight says “Bud Light.”
* When your absence exceeds your attendance.
* When your study schedule is based on the rationale that you “might” actually die before the test!
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