We all know those cute little computer symbols called “emoticons,” where :) means a smile and :( is a frown. Sometimes these are represented by :-) and :-( respectively. Well, how about some “ass-cons”? Here goes:

(_!_) a regular ass


(__!__) a fat ass


(!) a tight ass


(_._) a flat ass


(_^_) a bubble ass


(_*_) a sore ass


(_!__) a lop-sided ass


{_!_} a swishy ass


(_o_) an ass that's been around


(_O_) an ass that's been around even more


(_x_) kiss my ass


(_X_) leave my ass alone


(_zzz_) a tired ass


(_o^o_) a wise ass


(_13_) an unlucky ass


(_$_) Money coming out of his ass


(_?_) Dumb Ass