+Blonde Deodorant

A blonde goes to a store's deodorant display and tells the clerk “I need to buy some deodorant for my husband.”

“Does he use the ball kind?” inquired the clerk.

“No,” replied the blonde, “The kind for under his arms.”


++Problems With the Boat

During late spring one year, a blonde was trying out her new boat. She was unable to have her boat perform, travel through water, or do any maneuvers whatsoever no matter how hard she tried.

After trying for over three days to make it work properly, she decided to seek help. She putted the boat over to the local marina in hopes that someone there could identify her problem.

Workers determined that everything from the engine to the outdrive was working perfectly on the topside of the boat. So, a puzzled marina employee jumped into the water to check underneath the boat for problems. Because he was laughing so hard, he came up choking on water and gasping for air. Under the boat, still strapped in place securely, was the trailer.


+++Blondes and Gambling

A dumb blonde was standing in front of a soda machine outside of a local store. After putting in sixty cents, a root beer pops out of the machine. She set it on the ground, puts sixty more cents into the machine, and pushes another button; suddenly, a coke comes out the machine!

She continued to do this until a man waiting to use the machine became impatient. “Excuse me, can I get my soda and then you can go back to whatever stupid thing you are doing?”

The blonde turns around and says, “Yeah right! I'm not giving up this machine while I'm still winning!”

++++Blonde On First Class

On a plane bound for New York, the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she move to economy since she did not have a first class ticket.

The blonde replied, “I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York, and I'm not moving.”

Not wanting to argue with a customer, the flight attendant asked the copilot to speak with the woman. The copilot went to talk with the woman, asking her to move out of the first class section.

Again, the blonde replied, “I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York, and I'm not moving.”

The copilot returned to the cockpit and asked the captain what he should do.

The captain said, “I'm married to a blonde, and I know how to handle this.” He went to the first class section and whispered into the blonde's ear. She immediately jumped up and ran to the economy section, mumbling to herself, “Why didn't anyone just say so?” Surprised, the flight attendant and the copilot asked what he said to her that finally convinced her to move from her seat.

He said, “I told her the first class section wasn't going to New York.”

+++++Blonde Exposure

The blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out.

A policeman approaches her and says, “Ma'am, are you aware I could cite you for indecent exposure?”

She says, “Why, officer?” “Because your breast is exposed.”

“Oh. my God”, says the blond. "I left the baby on the bus