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Did you ever stop to wonder what would happen if your dog's name was Penis?
My Penis ate my homework.
Oh, no! My Penis is frothing at the mouth!
Sorry I'm late. I was playing with my Penis.
I'm sorry, Officer. I didn't realize I had to keep my Penis on a leash.
My Penis doesn't come when I call it.
My Penis likes to crawl between the legs of guests.
I love giving my Penis a bath. At night, I sleep with my Penis in my hands.
My Penis likes it when people pet him.
My Penis needs to get more exercise. He weighs over fifty pounds.
Playing with my Penis really wears me out.
Would you like to see a picture of my Penis?
Sometimes I wake up, and my Penis is already active.
I think my Penis has a mind of its own.
I keep a picture of my Penis in my wallet.
Whenever I get lost, my Penis points me in the right direction.
I think my Penis is getting old because he won't get excited anymore. He just plays dead.
My Penis got out last night. I think he's sleeping with the lady next door.
If my Penis was a weinerdog, he would be long and hairy and hard to carry.
My Penis loves to chase pussies in dark alleys.
Help! I can't find my Penis!
Sorry to be driving so slow, officer, but I was looking for my Penis.
My Penis gets excited whenever the mailman comes.
Sorry to be driving so fast, officer. I have to take my Penis to the hospital.
Oh. no! Something bit my Penis!
Watch it or you'll step on my Penis.
Stop kicking my Penis.

My Penis is truly man's best friend.
Beware of my Penis. He's carrying a disease.
People say my Penis looks cute lying down, but even better when standing at attention.
My Penis: the crotch-sniffer.
There's nothing like a well-trained bitch for my Penis.
I've trained my Penis to jump through hoops.
My Penis always searches for an open hand under the dinner table.
Excuse me, I need a muzzle for my Penis.
Sorry I'm late, but my Penis kept me up howling all night.


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